How I Deal with Criticism - Part 3

#3: It takes Trust in Myself to Deal with Criticism.

When the critic’s voice is loud in my ear I often fall back on a few things I know about myself:

1. I have to trust my process of decision making. Critics can make us 2nd guess our decision making process. In those moments I have to trust that the way I chose to make the decision was adequate and effective. If not, then their criticism was not entirely unfounded.

2. I have to trust the Information I had at the time of the decision. Every leader is called on at times to make decisions without all of the possible information. In fact, I would venture to say that there are very few times when I actually have all of the information necessary to make a decision. At the end of the day, I have to trust that based upon the information I had, I made the wisest decision for the organization.

3. I have to trust the View of the Mountain I had at the time. The essence of leadership is movement. A leader who is not moving is leading. That being the case, every decision happens in real time while climbing a mountain, so to speak. It is the job of the leader to make the wisest decision possible with the information they had at the time while standing where they are on the mountain.

When criticism comes, I have to trust these 3 things: My decision making ability, the information I had, and my view of the mountain at the time.

Challenge: The next time you make a decision, pause after the fact, and examine the way you came to the decision you did. Take into account the information and view of the mountain.

Just a bloggish thought,

Matt

 

How I Deal with Criticism - Part 2

#2: It takes Security to Deal with Criticism Effectively.

Yesterday, we started talking about the Issue of Criticism in Leadership. I have found that security is the backbone of good leadership. When a leader is insecure, every decision becomes about them and their feelings rather than the good of the organization.

Secure leaders can hear hard things. It’s not always easy to hear the things I need to hear in leadership. And the truth is, that which I need to hear most, is probably what I want to hear the least. But that’s how we get better, hearing the hard stuff every once in a while.

Secure leaders believe in themselves and their calling. There are moments in time where a leader must fall back on their calling to do what they’re doing. When the criticism is piling on, a leader has to be able to have the confidence that God has placed them here and that’s enough.

Secure leaders live in reality. I have to realize that there will be times in my leadership when I say dumb things, or make wrong decisions that effect people. In those moments, I have to be willing to face the reality of the situation and take what’s coming on the chin. It’s not easy, but it’s right. And I’m always stronger on the other side for it.

? Are you living in reality? Do you run from criticism or do you stand and own your mistakes?

Just a bloggish thought,

Matt

 

How I Deal with Criticism - Part 1

This week I want to spend some time talking about the issue of Criticism in Leadership. When I was younger, I think I used to see criticism as a bad thing… something to be avoided. But over the past several years, I am beginning to deal with criticism differently. That’s what this week’s bloggish thoughts are about.

#1: Criticism is Not Optional in Leadership.

Probably the best thing that has helped me deal with criticism is coming to grips with the reality that criticism is going to happen. There’s no avoiding it.

Somebody somewhere at some time, is not going to like a decision you make.

I heard Mark Batterson say recently, “You are not going to be able to please all of the people all of the time, so you might as well decide in advance who you’re going to offend.”

Leaders who fear criticism have trouble leading. If we’re always making sure that everybody is happy with every decision we make, we’re never going to lead our organizations where they need to go.

Challenge Question: Where have you been fearing the criticism of someone near you? Do you have unrealistic expectations about criticism in your leadership?

Just a bloggish thought,

Matt

 

5 Decisions I’ve Made about Myself - Part 5

Decision #5: I will take responsibility for leveraging my passions and talents in such a way that they add value to others way more than they will ever be able to add value to me.

There is a temptation that can begin to creep in as we grow in our areas of strength and giftedness and that is this…

Our talents can become more about Us then Others. In other words, we allow our passions and abilities to add more value to us than they do others. Pursuing them becomes more about what they can do for us, then it does what they can do for others.

The true path to greatness is found when we use our Strengths, Passions, Talents and Giftings to add more value to others, than they could ever add to ourselves.

Challenge Question: Are we using our talents for personal gain, or for adding value to others?

just a bloggish thought,

Matt

 

5 Decisions I’ve Made about Myself - Part 4

Decision #4: I will remain Ruthlessly teachable in my areas of talent!

Here’s another temptation of growing in our areas of strength and passion:

The better we get, the more likely we are to become Unteachable. Here’s why…

We allow our success to become the cloud that fogs our future success. We may find ourselves saying (or thinking) things like, “Who are you to give me advice? Do you see what I’ve accomplished?”

I have made the decision that I will not allow this type of thinking to cloud my vision for continuing to grow in my areas of talent and ability.

Challenge Question: Are you remaining teachable, even in the face of success? When was the last time you learned something from someone who is behind you?

just a bloggish thought,

matt

 

5 Decisions I’ve Made about Me - Part 3

Decision #3: I will have courage in facing the unknowns that arise from advancing in my talents.

Here’s what I’m learning about my talents… The further I go in developing them, the more there is that I don’t know about them! The natural tendency for humans is to resist what we don’t know. Especially when it’s an area we’re passionate about. The last thing in the world we want is to look stupid, especially in an area we care about, right?

I am making the decision to push past those fears and just go hard into learning all that I don’t know about the areas of my life that I am passionate about and have talent in. Here’s why…

The minute I learn something new, I add exponential value to myself. Because I’m developing an area of strength, I don’t just add value, I multiply it! For example, when I learn something new about public speaking (an area of strength for me) I make myself way more valuable, then when I learn something new about Rock Climbing (an area of weakness for me!)

Challenge Question: Where have you been letting fear or insecurity keep you from learning or growing in an area of strength or passion?

just a bloggish thought,

Matt

 

5 Decisions I’ve Made about Me - Part 2

This week we’re talking about 5 decisions I’ve made about my personal strengths, passions, giftings, talents, hopes and dreams. It’s not enough to just have all those things, we have to make daily decisions that move us in the direction of them. Here’s #2…

Decision #2: I will Prepare Now for a Preferred Future Later.

One of the greatest hang ups to playing to our areas of talent and passion is that we’re waiting for the Long Bomb. In other words, we think, “Well, since I can’t do something big with this yet, I won’t do anything.”

As someone who desires to make an impact on people, I have made the decision that I am going to do something today that helps me take a step or two in the direction of my greatest talents, strengths, passions and abilities.

We can’t have a destination mentality when it comes to playing to our strengths. The destination is today. What will we do today that will help us to develop or grow our talents and abilities?

Challenge Question: What 1 thing (no matter how small it may seem) will you do today to move in the direction of your greatest talents and passions?

just a bloggish thought,

matt

 

5 Decisions I’ve Made About Me - Part 1

LIfe has a way of getting busy, doesn’t it? I mean, the stuff of life can distract us pretty easily, pretty much everyday. However, with limited time & limited resources, I know that, as a leader, I’ve got to make the most of the Talents, Giftings, Hopes & Dreams I’ve been given. After all, it’s in those areas that I will make the greatest contribution to the world around me during my time here on earth.

This week I want to talk about 5 Decisions I’ve Made about my Talents, Giftings, Hopes & Dreams. I hope it’s encouraging to you.

Decision #1: I Will Give Priority Energy to Them Everyday!

Too many people wait until their To-Do List is cleared before they give significant time and energy to what they do best! Yes, there is a time and place for “getting things done” but I want to challenge everyone of us today that, “The place where we will add the most value to the world is in the area where we are most passionate and gifted!”

1. It offers the greatest Return on Investment. When we give priority energy to our strengths, we get a better return on our investment! How much would Peyton Manning get paid by the Indianapolis Colts to play Wide Receiver? I’m guessing, Not Much! But when he’s playing Quarterback, he’s worth millions!!! Our strengths offer our greatest ROI.

2. Our Strengths offer the greatest Reward! There is nothing more fulfilling for me as a leader than when I’m using my God given talents, passions and abilities to add value to someone else! There’s just no feeling like it! I love it! It energizes me and makes me feel like I’m on top of the world!

I have made a decision in my leadership that I am going to begin giving Priority Energy to what I do best! Then, and only then, can I make a significant contribution to the world around me!

just a bloggish thought,

Matt

 

How I think about Discouragement - Part 5

#5: Discouragement is a Propeller.

Everytime we face discouragement we have 2 choices of what it can become for us:

A Propeller or an Anchor. One pushes us forward, the other weighs us down. There is a long term residual effect tied to discouraging season in our life. Truly great leaders know how to make the most of discouraging season in such a way that when they look back on them years later then see them as a propeller, not an anchor on the journey of their life.

It’s up to us to start looking for the sunrise. It’s always darkest before the dawn. When you feel discouraged, start looking for the sunrise. It will come. I spoke with someone recently who was going through a tough time and they made the comment: “I’m glad my new home faces the east, because I need more sunrises in my life then sunsets right now!”

Gravity can crush us, or slingshot us! Remember when the Apollo 13 space craft (I wasn’t born yet, but I saw the movie with Tom Hanks) used the gravitational pull of the moon to slingshot it back to earth? That’s what discouragement has the ability to do for us! Slingshot us toward our next great adventure!

Where have you been allowing Discouragement to feel like a tremendous weight? How can you turn it into a slingshot?

Just a bloggish thought,

matt

 

How I think about Discouragement - Part 4

#4: Discouragement is an Opportunity.

Human nature wants to throw us into a negative spin with discouragement in our lives. However, as leaders, if we can develop the discipline to see discouragement as an opportunity we’ll gain so much from it.

It’s an opportunity to learn something new. The root of Discouragement is usually from an unmet expectation. Every unmet expectation has a lesson attached to it. Every lesson is an opportunity for us to learn something new about ourselves or the organization we lead.

An opportunity to be stretched. Discouragement often comes from an uncomfortable situation. Every uncomfortable situation is a chance for us to be stretched in our leadership.

An opportunity to be challenged to become stronger, smarter and better! True strength comes from falling into the arms of Heavenly Father. Every time we do that, we get stronger! Let discouragement push you toward the Cross of Jesus, rather than away from it.

What opportunities are available to you because of the presence of discouragement in your life this week? What can you learn?

Just a bloggish thought,

Matt